I was just in time for lunch. I was given two peanut butter sandwiches on day old bread. Those sandwiches were really dry, I kept yelling at the guard...for water. He finally brought me a tin cup half full of brackish water. I took it and drained the cup. I handed it back to him and said, "Fresh water this time and fill the cup up."The deputy took back the cup and replied, "You know ever since the sheriff came up with this new menu, we don't get many hobos getting arrested anymore. And you only. The lights were dimmed and the screen lowered. The slide show began with sexy music playing in the background. Each shot was held still for 15 seconds until the last four, the ones in the fan. They were held for 30 seconds. The lights come up and all the executives stood clapping and Tom had a huge smile on his face. Everyone sat back down and Tom spoke, “Damn fellas, I knew it would be great but these were the best I have ever seen in 30 years here. This offer I have for you seems inadequate. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- Okay, here's the backtrack. A guy I know that frequents a certain stripclub in North Beach swears that one of the dancers there, this hot littleblondie with habit of wearing white vinyl, is actually a dude. Not atranny or anything like that, but an honest-to-gawd former man that's nowa woman, like genetically. Of course I called bullshit, but he told methe kicker: it's not just any dude, she's really Tommy Valadega, fromhigh school.Tommy Vee,. The man I owed the money to wanted two thousand dollars additional, and up front, as a fee for the plan.I blurted, “how do I get the money?” He sat back smiling.“As it happens I have an, um, business man who is interested in investing in my company. However he wants to know what our, um, business plan for the future is. Since you are a part of that I would be willing to pay you the two K if you 'convinced' him to invest.”I knew he was basically telling me I needed to spend the night fucking.
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