Then for the next fifty miles of smaller and more dangerous state roads, I thought about my future. Where would I find some peace from the constant ne...d to be on the move. The money hadn't reduced my urge to 'DO SOMETHING TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE'. It wasn't grand gestures I had been after, just small things. By the time I got down to the county road leading to the marina, I knew I was just as lost as ever. I did have tears streaming down my face. I felt so fucking lost.When I pulled the candy cane. Time was 4 a.m. She had two more hours until the next naked day outside.She did not stay asleep anymore. Finally at 5.30 she rose out of bed and started to prepare hot tea. Chills still plagued her. She almost cried, because after half an hour she had to go outside naked. Now she was inside and dressed, but nevertheless felt much cold. „How can I go?“ she asked itself and burst into tears.After drinking hot tea and eating sandwich she maybe felt a little bit better. Chills were still there and. I don’t have too many clear memories of her. My childhood was very stressful and distraught at times, so some memories that I wish were clear to me are not. When I think of my Nannie I have a very clear image of her sitting in a faded white rocking chair on the front porch of her tiny little Tallassee house. Her hair was mostly dark, shot with silver and grey in places. I believe that every time we visited her there she was waiting for us on the front porch. A can of snuff was always tucked. Ek bar mom shadi me kahi bahar gayi thi aur gharpe mai aur ashok kaka hi the .Mai abhi khana kha rha tha to achanak muze peshab lag gayi islia mai bathroom ki taraf gaya to dekha ki ashok mom ki panty me muth mar raha tha aur kah raha ki asha ek bar agar teri chud mil to maja aa jaye .Jaise hi mai waha pahucha to ashok kaka chauk gaye aur mere taraf zuki huyi nazaro se dekhne lage maine bhi peshab ki aur ashok ko apne rum me bulaya aur use puchha ki ye kab se kar rahe to usne bataya ki malik.
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