“His ego is already big enough!”“There can only be one person in the house who thinks they are a god,” I said piously, “and Jess has that po...ition sewn up!”“Watch it, Tiger. For all intents and purposes, I AM your god!”“I think a certain three-year-old might disagree!” I chuckled.“Dad!” Jesse exclaimed. “Your beard!”“I shaved it for tonight.”“Daddy, I like your beard,” Birgit said, sounding sad.“Pumpkin, I’ll let it grow back. Tonight is like Halloween.”“Is that a costume?” Matthew asked.I. Finally I saw the tiny clock on my computer turn to 12, locking the computer, I moved as fast as I could, well, as fast as I could without giving away my vampire speed movements, snatching up my bag, pushing away my chair so hard it hurtled into the wall. As I turned I caught sight of myself in the mirror, shit, I looked worse than I thought. I couldn’t help it, being as vain as I am, I lingered in front of the mirror, checking out my vile appearance that I knew would dissipate one I got some. By all accounts this is looking like George was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Nothing they are finding says that he was being targeted.” I shrugged for a second, and said, “I’m not even sure this is illegal, just sneaky and underhanded. Well, we need to figure this out, and neither you nor I are going to be able to do that. We need to get a lawyer involved. Will you ask the colonel to come back in? By the way, when all this is over with, we need to come up with a way to say thank you to. ’ I listened, waiting. ‘But what I don’t understand is why you seem so . . . comfortable doing it. I mean, I’ve been at this for over seven years now, and since day one, it has always felt like a job. Sure, I enjoy it, but . . . but you . . . it’s like you prefer it this way. Going from man to man, catering to them so completely. It’s like, no matter what they want, you want. And I don’t think it’s an act.’ I thought about what she said, picking my nails. ‘I don’t know any other way,’ I said in.
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Once during sophomore year while walking home, a homeless man interrupted me and informed me that he believed that I had an ass of a woman and a face
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